Twas a bit before Christmas
And Santa was perplexed
First, the elves got into the eggnog
And now the sleigh’s a literal wreck
Wanting a boost in their hay
Oh poor Santa was having
One heck of a day
Mrs. Claus spilled Merlot
Down the seat of his pants
And there was a pretty good possibility
That his bathroom had ants
The North Pole sign
Had been stolen by bears
And his hat no longer fit
But do you think anyone cares?
The elves were trying their best
To make things right
But his heck of a day
Was turning into one hell of a night
A call just came through
That Rudolph’s been found
Unfortunately for Santa
He was froze to the ground
And the Stocking Department said,
“We’re coming up short,
On the little chocolate things
It’s all in the report”
Santa went inside
To take a small break
For a very brief moment
He wished he WERE fake.
But his
Broke through his blues
All he needed was a bite to eat
And a quick little snooze
When he awoke
A simple thought took hold
“This year I’ll make it easy
And everyone gets coal!”
So remember this story
With it’s lesson to learn
But as a small condolence
At least your present burns
